CosmicWise

...lighting the candle of personal awareness & becoming ...

Friendship

Comment:
Friendship is such a special thing to have in one's life. Could it be that it is easy or difficult depending on how we define it for ourselves? In other words, that we each have different expectations from others? I am curious, how do you define friendship?
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Response:
Friendships commence between two that are naturally drawn together. It proceeds to evolve because the two find a mutual resonance with each other. It unfolds and develops because boundaries are respected and valued by both. The friendship deepens because trust is allowed to genuinely build. To know if you are a good candidate for friendship, first look to see if you are your own very best friend.

I personally don't look for friendships--I don't need to because I am my own best friend, therefore, I am not looking for a "stand-in". Does this mean that I can't find value in friendships? Absolutely not. I just go about the business of living my life, meeting it on it's terms, and if the potentiality for friendship is presented to me, I won't shy away. But then, neither do I force it, however much it appears to be the grandest connection there ever was.

Step-by-natural-step, I move forward but only if the way forward is opening of it's own accord. Appearances often seem to wave us on ahead but appearances can too often be deceptive, hence, appearances don't mean much to me, I know better than to get caught up in the excitement of the moment; true friendship is more subtle than that.

In all, any given friendship is the reflection of our ability (or lack thereof) to comfort, respect and trust ourselves. Most seek to fill their nagging emptiness through relationship, yet no one person can fill this existential hole.. sooner or later, we all learn this truth. And so, good friendships are great experiences wherein we find out how deeply we've managed to connect with our deeper self. As well, friendships that fail are great indicators of the need to look within and see clearly how we've been failing to self-nurture.. afterall, charity begins at home.

Demitra M.N.